Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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