haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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