For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
he was CRYING into my vagina
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
