Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
