im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
