Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
