your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
