We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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