Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
