"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
