also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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