'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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