I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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