Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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