their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
