"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
