Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
