You're completely useless in the revolution.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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