Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
