no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
