He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Just pee around me
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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