I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
