That's intense
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
