All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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