is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
He passed out mid-signature
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Randomize
