well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
