Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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