We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Actions speak louder than pants.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize