yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
