Where is the hickey?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
