Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Randomize
