we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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