so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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