Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
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