Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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