barbara walters just said penis...
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
