after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
