If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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