My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
