Got a toothbrush?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
