There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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