I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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