would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize