She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Randomize
