I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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