shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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