So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize
