My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
