yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
