A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
