He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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